This weeks Science stories

[Quahom1]

Originally Posted by wil

The Buffalo Theory

In an episode of "Cheers," Cliff Clavin the trivia-spouting, quirky, irksome mama's boy mailman is seated at the bar describing the buffalo theory to his buddy, Norm Peterson, the beer loving heavyweight bar stool sitting perpetual patron.

Cliff expounds his "Buffalo Theory" to Norm.


“Well, you see, Norm, it’s like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it’s the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.

And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers.”

Alcohol doesn't care what it attacks, since it doesn't know it is attacking anything. Hence all brain cells are subject to destruction, particularly the faster cells which absorb "nutrients" at a faster rate than the older and slower cells. Hence, your theory has big holes in it.

v/r

Q

[juantoo3]

Originally Posted by Quahom1

Alcohol doesn't care what it attacks, since it doesn't know it is attacking anything. Hence all brain cells are subject to destruction, particularly the faster cells which absorb "nutrients" at a faster rate than the older and slower cells. Hence, your theory has big holes in it.

v/r

Q

Theories with huge holes in them were the specialty of Cliff Clavin on "Cheers." It was supposed to be ironical. And funny.

Mostly funny.

[wil]

Originally Posted by juantoo3

Theories with huge holes in them were the specialty of Cliff Clavin on "Cheers." It was supposed to be ironical. And funny.

Mostly funny.

maybe it was the booze speakin...

how's this one..

Story Highlights
-Nima Arkani-Hamed, a theoretical physicist, predicts large extra dimensions
-The Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland may confirm his ideas
-LHC results may change ideas of spacetime for the first time since Einstein
-String theory postulates that the building blocks of matter are vibrating strings