The "OF" Corral

[flowperson]

Yep, you reach a certain age and you get coralled. Not intentionally you understand, it's just that the passing of the "55" barrier automatically relegates you to new labels and names. Old timer, Gramps, Pops, Granny, Geezer, Maw, and the ever present and ever popular "Old Fart" seem to be the most popular and most fitting to the genre'.

Now, this is something that has been involunatrily imposed by the rest of society upon those of us who have attained a certain level of age and wisdom. However societies, and especially Western societies, tend to compulsively and obsessively focus upon the young and their perceived achievements in order to create saleable self images.

I am creating this special place of serenity for persons of an advanced age and maturity to share stories about life. They don't have to be personalized for that is always a great risk in a public forum. Just stories that might demonstrate how OF Corral members might have come upon their particular insights, wisdoms, and philosophies for living a life.

The OF Corral is a fenced-in ten acre spread with a nice log clubhouse. The clubhouse has a full kitchen and dining facilities, along with all of the needed indoor plumbing conveniences. Members can bring thier own food and cook up a storm as long they are willing to share and clean up after themselves.

A side room is set up as a BYO open bar and is open from four to seven every evening. Intoxicating beverages can only be consumed in this room within those time periods. Each new member will be given a gratis snifter of their spirit of choice upon registration. Smoking is only allowed on the porch, and only if your fellow members who are there agree to it in their presence.

There's lots of nice sofas, armchairs, magazines and books, but no televisions or game consoles. Music is always playing and may be automatically varied upon member requests. Dancing is encouraged. Cellphones are not allowed, but a free telephone is available for use by members for their local calls. Parking on the premises is not allowed, but a lighted and asphalted lot is available just beyont the front gate.

The clubhouse features a wide wraparound porch with lots of cane bottom rocking chairs for those who wish the comforts of outdoor companionship. After all, confined spaces are a problem sometimes for OF's.
There's a grove of maples, oaks, and pines out back surrounding a pond stocked with bass and sunfish. Tackle and bait is available free of charge for member and their guest(s) under 12 years of age. Camping equipment is also avaible for sleep-outs and campfire experiences.

That's about it friends. There are no membership fees or dues. The CR COC is the governing set of rules. Everything is virtual right down to and including any gas which may be passed.

C'mon in everyone, whose age and experience automatically qualifies them. And in case anyone wants to know, I decided to formally create and open this spread only because I read this story:

BBC NEWS | UK | England | Devon | Flatulence ban for club pensioner

Snoopy...since you and I are already enrolled, I expect that Mr. Fox should be invited to be our first "outside" member. In fact we'll probably encourage him to sit on the porch much of the time. Either that or keep the music turned way up in the clubhouse.

flow....

[17th Angel]

Want a doormen/security staff?

[flowperson]

17th...I expect that security considerations will be necessary given the realities of the virtual world, even in virtual rural settings. Once we have attained a rudimentary membership I expect we will undertake such an action.

I will put you down as the first to "volunteer" for the position, and I expect that in your case you will be allowed to hang your virtual artworks on the clubhouse walls so long as they are not too "upsetting" for the members.

flow....

[wil]

You know you guys have a lot to offer if you can remember it.

What I need most is some preparation notes, no not preparation h, some cliff notes indicating what to expect at that doublenickels barrier.

I mean would joining that insurance hawking aarp be good preparation or is that a waste of time.

Should I subscribe to checklist and readers digest and rv living now or wait.


Hmmm...there have got to be a ton of good RVs out there that are good for scooping up when you OFers lose driving privileges.

I've got 1/10 of my life before I am auto enrolled into your club, but I'd like to have most of my ducks in a row prior to getting there.

Been practicing canasta, euchre, bridge, duckpins, bocci, shuffleboard, dominoes, gin, and suduko, can't get into crosswords yet.

Hey, I gotta OF joke.

"Are there any indications that someone is ready for the OF corral before the age of 55?"

The OFers sitting on the porch answered in unison from their rocking chairs, "Just Depends."

[dauer]

I think ageism goes both ways.

-- dauer

[wil]

Originally Posted by dauer

I think ageism goes both ways.

-- dauer

Oh quite definitely! Do we get the early bird dinner special at Denny's? NO

Do we get over 60 discount Tuesday at wherever? NO

Do we get to audit any college course for free? NO

Do we have a blue pill invented just for us? NO

I could go on and on, but I won't because I'm now eligible for some of the discounts and anxiously awaiting the rest.

[flowperson]

wil...Hey brother, your ducks are your ducks exclusively. Time is only a local (in terms of space/time) artificial construct anyway. The telomeres at the ends of our chromosomes are the only things that determine how old you truly are. The way you line up your ducks to prepare for the artificialities that society has constructed for you when you reach 55 are yours to deal with on your own. And yes, all AARP does is sell insurance. I've never joined. My Mom thinks I'm a Commie pinko or something.

I'll admit it's great to only have to pay 50 cents instead of a buck to get into the swap meet I favor. Hey, since we have ten acres, we could have a great swap meet once a month or so,. No admission charge, but 17th will need to check ID's to make sure no underagers get in to sully the affair.

Dauer...what goes around comes around...the circle of life...birth, life, decay, death, rebirth...we're all in the same four dimensional trap my brother. I'm just trying to establish some virtual privilege and respect for those of us who are still lookin' for their propers.

And besides you could always put on your 2nd world persona and lurk around the OF Corral all you wish. We won't task 17th with any 2nd level security issues. We want him to have enough spare time to put some nice art on the clubhouse walls.

Oh, BTW, I do like young women. Besides, hereabouts in the sinful valley, young women always get into bars, clubs, music rooms, etc., for free. Talk about discriminatory non-pricing policies !

flow....

[dauer]

wil,

I'm not speaking in terms of material benefits. I'm speaking in terms of the way those who are older relate to those who are younger. All too frequently I hear claims to authority based on age which is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of, as if the only reason I hold a particular opinion is because of my age and when I'm older I'll realize how wrong I was. I've heard it used even to defend capital punishment on a much broader scale than we have now. Personal experiences can lead to all sorts of misconceptions. If anything I think as people get older they become more convinced of the strength behind their own opinions. Yet for the one who makes a claim to authority based on age there is likely another person who is older that makes a claim to authority supporting the younger individual based on an even greater age.

[wil]

Originally Posted by dauer

... All too frequently I hear claims to authority based on age which is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of, as if the only reason I hold a particular opinion is because of my age and when I'm older I'll realize how wrong I was. I've heard it used even to defend capital punishment on a much broader scale than we have now. Personal experiences can lead to all sorts of misconceptions. If anything I think as people get older they become more convinced of the strength behind their own opinions. Yet for the one who makes a claim to authority based on age there is likely another person who is older that makes a claim to authority supporting the younger individual based on an even greater age.

All good points. Yes our experiences leave us believing that others would have similar opinions if they had them. Doesn't always gel.

lol...Sounds like you need to hang around different OFs.

As I am now nearing the prescribed number as deemed by this thread I am around the OFs quite often and still find their experience valuable.

And it is with great regret at times that I can't communicate properly with the younger crowd, especially when I'd just like to not see them take the same pitfalls as I.

[wil]

You know you are getting ready for the OF corral when you say:

"That music is just a bunch of noise"

"Back when I was your age"

"The way we always did it"

"Look for a teenager, they'll show you how to fix that"

"Why I never"

"Did you look it up in the Encyclopedia?"

"The younger generation just has no respect"

[dauer]

wil,

not saying all older folks are like that or that I've never heard anything of value from someone who was older, just pointing out that it's a two-way street. What I said doesn't extend only to people over 55 either. I've heard it from people in their 30's.

-- dauer

[wil]

Originally Posted by dauer

..not saying all older folks are like that or that I've never heard anything of value from someone who was older, just pointing out that it's a two-way street. What I said doesn't extend only to people over 55 either. I've heard it from people in their 30's...

Namaste bro,

not saying you were, that was me!

lol... in the 60's the catch phrase was, "Never trust anyone over 30" of course them there hippies suddenly aged a lot faster than they ever anticipated and quickly that disappeared. he he even a 'young' hippie is just of the age to join the OF Corral!!

[flowperson]

Dauer my friend...You and I are living proof that intergenerational and intelligent communication is not only worthwhile, but very necessary in today's world. It's the intergenerational, unintelligent communication that gets us all in the soup.

wil...Are you related to Jeff Foxworthy ?

flow....

[dauer]

flow,

I agree. I think it can most certainly be productive and of value. I was only addressing ageism.

[Thomas]

Thanks Flow ...

As I'm just over a year off automatic membership, and assuming there's easy virtual access from the UK, I'm looking forward to relaxinging in the hospitality of the OFC.

... and a spot of sailing water, even a glorified puddle, would render your facilities paradise on earth.

May I also register my partner on the waiting list? She's a couple of years behind me. Not a contributor to CR by any stretch, but in mind of the initial inspiration for the OF Corral, she's a lifelong vegetarian, and on a good morning can float the duvet off the bed in one trump!

Thomas