Tears Of A Clown

Ciel · 03-02-2007, 05:22 PM

Palfi the clown calls, tears of laughter or tears upon tears of the real sad thing pouring out the phone. With real clowns it's hard to tell........ But he's a beautiful loving human being who needs a break from being sad. And through all those tears he told me a joke.......

Did you know, Henry Ford invented a laughter fueled car..........
But he couldn't market it because it was the depression.

Palfi travels far, anyone out there know the guy, give him a call.

Your clown needs you.

- c -

Pathless · 03-04-2007, 09:24 PM

Palfi usually calls me. I don't like to call him because, well, even with all the laughter, those tears are just so goshdarn depressing!

On a Saturday in June of 1994, he showed up at my door and wanted to go on a bike ride, as per usual in those days. He had one of those clown bikes, you know, where over a hundred people can fit in there. I had my own bike, though, and didn't ride tandem with Palfi. Didn't quite trust him them.

We stood outside my parents' house in the 'burbs, Palfi and I, smoking Pall Malls and not talking. Palfi, usually quite verbal with me, instead mimed a sad story.

We rode our bikes and got coffee, ate patty melts and waffles at Waffle House. Outside, beautiful banks of weeds grew. The sun beat down. The Waffle House filled with smoke and country music. And all those people staring at poor Palfi. Poor Palfi with his painted-on face, bulbous nose, painted on tears.

I touched his face. He smiled like he does, red lips, quirky. The grease paint slid off onto my fingers. I dabbed it under my eyes.

Palfi mimed to me the following: now you have the touch of the clown.

"I know," I nodded to him, tracing my finger over his lips, putting that red paint on mine. My mask, my very own mask.

That paint is heavy. The more I took from Palfi's face and put on mine, it didn't matter. He still had his own face. I couldn't take it from him, couldn't relieve him of his grief.

Sniffling, I took the red paint, took off my shirt, painted a red raw heart there on my chest.

Now you have opened, Palif mimed. I sobbed.

pfw · 03-10-2007, 04:10 PM

Clowns scare me.

flowperson · 03-10-2007, 11:01 PM

I second that !

flow....

Pathless · 03-12-2007, 10:16 PM

Perpetual deafness engulfs the clown. His look communicates something to me, something along the lines of, "We are mired in rot." I could still peel my mask away easily, but Palfi's is permanent and contagious. Thick sadness dabs the darkness under his eyes. He hasn't slept.

Perpetual silence, mute, is what Palfi surrounds himself in. He honks his nose, squeak squeak, sure, offers a smile, but he is dead and dead and dead again. A walking undead clown. Now there's something to be frightened of.

"Palfi, you haven't been taking care of yourself," I tell him. He holds up a hand tipped with neglected fingernails, flashes a false smile of unkempt teeth. Palfi lights a cigarette and inhales death.

Then he speaks.

"Not much work left for clowns these days." His voice is broken, deep, cracked with grief.

I watch Palfi, thinking no clown lives there while looking into his dead eyes. When he is satisfied with the smoke in his lungs, he stabs the cigarette out on his hand, does not flinch. No tears, no smile, nothing.

Inside his chest, I swear I hear his heart break.

Ciel · 03-13-2007, 01:49 AM

Pathless,

You play a game of fiction. Palfi is a real person and nothing to do with your assumed fictional writing. It would in fact hurt him to see your words. If you wish to fictionalise a clown could you post on the Fictionalise Yourself thread.

It just feels so wrong to write about him in this way.

- c -

Pathless · 03-13-2007, 02:03 AM

My bad, Ciel. I did not realize this was a real person. I misunderstood. I'll stop.

17th Angel · 03-13-2007, 04:27 PM

Clowns have a liking for children.. More than natural.. Like micheal jackson... And John Gacy...

wil · 03-13-2007, 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 17th

Clowns have a liking for children..

hey....I represent that remark...

cavalier · 03-13-2007, 04:50 PM

Is that a profession, or a hobby
I remember you writing something about being on the lawn at the Whitehouse, what else does your clowning work involve?

wil · 03-13-2007, 05:13 PM

I haven't worn that costume or face in over a dozen years...

Couple years ago I was a member of the DingBats, we performed on dugouts between innings at baseball games. I occaionally perform as a DumbWaiter...I look like a waiter tux shirt and bow tie...but am a clown without makeup at fundraisers and fancy catered dinner parties... I used to perform as a juggler, did a couple of NFL Redskin halftime shows and once opened for John Cougar Mellencamp. My performing today consists mostly of the occasional Emcee job, or some variety juggling, improv stuff...and it is few and far between, I don't promote it or seek it out. I do help organize some workshops for performers which is recognized as a masters level theatrical arts course.

I did some street performing, school shows, corporate events, picnics, fairs and birthday parties back in the day...but when the twins were born I pretty much quit...

I've got an urge to go play at some nursing homes...that was always fun, I'd juggle and goof down the hall...and then give unicycle rides. A lot of the facilities are in quadrangles with courtyards...and I'd get behind their wheelchairs and roll them around the hall with me on my unicycle behind them, wind in their hair and smiles on their faces, we'd dodge the nurses and other residents... they'd line up along the corridor waiting their turn...

reminiscing brings a smile to my face...I oughta start painting up the kids and build a routine...and go play again...

Pathless · 03-13-2007, 07:02 PM

wil, that is awesome!! At first, I was all like, "How can you give a unicycle ride?? What, do they sit on his lap?" But that image you conjured up of you pushing them merrily along with your clown costume and unicycle... fantastic!

Viva la clown!

And Palfi, I am sorry. I knew not what I did.

Ciel · 03-13-2007, 08:03 PM

Pathless,

It's okay.......

And top marks for the reality check.

love - c -

flowperson · 03-14-2007, 12:31 AM

Mea Culpa on my clown comment... wil, you're one in a million.

flow....

17th Angel · 03-14-2007, 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wil

hey....I represent that remark...

That's a photo of you? lol... nice... I used to kinda HALF dress up like a clown years back... more like this though. http://www.pub.umich.edu/daily/1999/...photos/icp.gif Playing on the darker sides of a clown...