smoking - Page 11

China Cat Sunflower · 06-06-2008, 03:07 AM

I don't believe in will power, Alex. One part of me can't be set up to take control over another part of me. The lazy procrastinator part can easily trick the stick-up-it's-butt "will power" part. None of that affirmation sh!t ever worked for me. I'm way, way too smart for my own good. That's always been the problem.

Chris

juantoo3 · 06-06-2008, 06:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Paladin

Proof positive that aging and memory loss has multiple health benefits!

Touche!

Alex P · 06-06-2008, 09:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by China Cat Sunflower

I don't believe in will power, Alex. One part of me can't be set up to take control over another part of me. The lazy procrastinator part can easily trick the stick-up-it's-butt "will power" part. None of that affirmation sh!t ever worked for me. I'm way, way too smart for my own good. That's always been the problem.

Chris

But here you are... A drug that is more addictive than heroine.... Been smoking It I am sure for quite sometime.... (Cigarettes that is lol.) And eight weeks clean, you had a very hard hitting experience I know (again my thoughts are with you and your whole family) Something such as that I am sure would increase my personal smoking rate, but dealing with that has influenced something within you, when death comes to the door of a close one, it makes us feel and look upon death as a cluster bomb.... It's hit, it's hit close.... I could be next... That effects many chains of thought... All that is left is for us to take these thoughts and mold them..... Maybe you are too smart for your own good, maybe smarter than you think for your own good. Congratulations though, the first three weeks (I've never made it that far lol.) are the hell ride, after that your body is clean of nicotine... Now just waiting for the clean up crew to finish.

greymare · 06-06-2008, 12:02 PM

ok, ive got to update this........
my friend I told you about previously, 25/9 07 diagnosed with agressive lung cancer.....ok, she had her ops, got most of her lungs removed..... terrible scars......... living healthy, now.

had a seizure last week at work. brain tumor, which they ahve removed.
she just rang me now to say shes been released from hospital and told to "get her affairs" in order. she has 3 months at the most.

how the f--k do you get your "affairs in order".
how do you tell your boys, your friends, your family???
she is not religious (in any faith) that is, but i did read her cards for her a couple times.
i knew it was coming (doesnt take a medical degree)
what do I say to her.......... to her hubby? to her boys?
they were going to celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary in october this year.
I have to work tomorrow but ill be visiting her straight after........
i need suggestions..............

Alex P · 06-06-2008, 12:04 PM

A time to be calm, a time to accept and a time to find peace... All that has needed to be said should be said.

And suggestions? Treat her just like you would of 5months ago... A friend, a sister...

greymare · 06-06-2008, 12:06 PM

oh i need a hug

Alex P · 06-06-2008, 12:09 PM

Then go and hug your dear friend, I am sure she will be needing one too

Just keep being the same with her boost her confidence, get her family in... That I say is a big thing to do... I feel it adds.... A will to live... A will to fight because you can see what you live for. And to be surrounded by the ones you love, is how you should be, if it does come to pass that you need to depart onwards upon your path, it is best to have the ones you love and hold dear to be there.

Remember there is always hope...

greymare · 06-06-2008, 12:13 PM

well i will tomorrow. thanks alex
Im sitting here crying like a baby .............god, just think how she is feeling?/// how scary is it to know you are dying when you dont believe in anything??
that thought just occurred to me. I mean, im looking and i have a few views, but now, faced with her own mortality.........????????????? What if she asks me????? what can I say????????? i dont have a clue??????????
(oh great, now im just worried about ME again)
dont listen to me, im incoherent....... Ill just sit here a while

Alex P · 06-06-2008, 12:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by greymare

well i will tomorrow. thanks alex
Im sitting here crying like a baby .............god, just think how she is feeling?/// how scary is it to know you are dying when you dont believe in anything??
that thought just occurred to me. I mean, im looking and i have a few views, but now, faced with her own mortality.........????????????? What if she asks me????? what can I say????????? i dont have a clue??????????
(oh great, now im just worried about ME again)
dont listen to me, im incoherent....... Ill just sit here a while

Stop... Previous post....

"A time to be calm, a time to accept and a time to find peace... All that has needed to be said should be said."

Search your heart, this post isn't just aimed at your dear friend... I have found upon death beds/or death location... This magical aura.... I have never NEVER seen someone fear.... They are calm, they seem at peace and they have accepted that this is their time to go home...

Seriously, I have seen many die..... Not one in fear.... when it is your time. And that now I recall back to all death beds I have been at, my fathers, friends, all grand parents, uncle, cousin, fellow soldiers..... As like someone has told them how it is going to go, that hey, it's going to be fine...

Stay strong, for your friend.

greymare · 06-06-2008, 12:23 PM

yep, thnks, ill try

Alex P · 06-06-2008, 12:25 PM

Sorry I know it is hard to "be strong" I told myself this and ended up sheding tears at my fathers bed after I got to tell him I loved and forgave him.... Only those that live suffer, those that pass on are at peace.

juantoo3 · 06-07-2008, 11:46 AM

Oh dear, grey.

I wish I had words more comforting than Angel's, but at times like this words fail me.

I think Angel is right though. Go hug your friend. And cherish what time you two have left.

I'll keep ya'll in my prayers.

greymare · 06-07-2008, 12:51 PM

thank u my darling, im struggling and I know she is and so is her hubby Bill
If i ever ask anything of all of you please, say a prayer to whoever your lord and god is........... say a prayer for my friends Uni and Bill........ they need your strength and love and conviction and all of it......... they need it........................... send it to them for me........... please......... thanks..

Netti-Netti · 06-08-2008, 07:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by greymare

thank u my darling, im struggling and I know she is and so is her hubby Bill

If i ever ask anything of all of you please, say a prayer to whoever your lord and god is........... say a prayer for my friends Uni and Bill........ they need your strength and love and conviction and all of it......... they need it........................... send it to them for me........... please......... thanks..

Know that G-d's touch will remove all pain
and you will all meet again in Heaven.

Amen.

wil · 06-09-2008, 08:52 PM

Namaste Grey,

We are here for you, you can be there for them.

She has been blessed with knowing and blessed with some time. So many go with so many word unsaid. Her family and you can be open and honest with your feelings as she can with you and her loved ones.

If she's upto it they can get out the video camera and interview her about her childhood and recollections of family past and present that she has. They could garner hours of memories and moments, of laughter and tears, taking advantage of the time she's been provided.

To prepare a family and friends for your transition, what a blessing, usually it is foisted on us without notice. Love this time.

Hugs all around.

peace

wil