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Old 01-21-2006, 09:28 PM   #1 (permalink)
Scarlet Pimpernel
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I'm aware this might offend some...

I told lunamoth to check the Lounge for an update, though I’m worried that this may very quickly end up more appropriate for the Politics and Society forum.

First off, in general, I’m doing fine – still preparing for graduation (one semester left, yahoo!) and for job-hunting. On top of that I’ve usually got one or two auditions and one or two concerts every month, so I’ve got plenty to keep me busy.




The main thing going on in my life is this:


Love shook my heart

like the wind on the mountain

rushing over the oak trees

- Sappho





Scarlet Pimpernel

and

Marguerite St. Just

are pleased to announce

that they will be legally married

in a private ceremony

on Tuesday, the twenty-first of February

Two thousand six

Maastricht, the Netherlands




I snailmailed this to a few members of my family in the US (with our real names, of course). I’ve been putting it off emailing it to the rest (I know email is not proper ettiquette but I don’t have snailmail addresses for everyone, besides which, overseas postage is shockingly expensive) for the same reason I’ve been putting off posting it here: fear of people’s reaction.



My reason for posting it here in the first place is not to offend anyone, or to wave my sexuality under anyone’s nose, or anything like that. It is simply that I care about the people who post here (as odd as it seems to care about people one has never actually met, I do), this is an important and joyous occurrence in my life, and I want to share it.



It seems ridiculous that, that being the case, I feel the need to couch my announcement in layers of apologetics. My partner and I are not trying to make a mockery of the institution of marriage. Far from it – it is because we have so much respect for marriage that we have made this decision. We love each other and want to spend our lives together, and want to publicly announce and solidify that commitment. We also want recognition of that commitment, from family and friends as well as from the Dutch government.



This ceremony will not take place in a house of worship – by Dutch law a civil marriage or registered partnership must take place first, followed by an optional religious ceremony (optional from the point of view of the government, of course). As neither my partner nor I are church-goers, and setting aside the difficulty of finding a clergyperson willing to perform a same-sex ceremony, having a church ceremony would seem to be pretending to be something we are not, and ultimately more disrespectful than only having a civil ceremony would be.



I fully expect some people here to be upset by this, just as I expect certain members of my family to be upset by it, or at least deeply confused. I’m not doing it, or even saying it, with the goal of upsetting you personally. Like I said, I care about the people here, and that’s why I want to share it with all of you. As a matter of fact, maybe if this starts a dialogue, that will lead to more openness and understanding.

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Old 01-22-2006, 12:00 AM   #2 (permalink)
juantoo3
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

Kindest Regards, Scarlet Pimpernel!

For what it is worth, my views on same sex marriage are irrelevent to your (and your partner's) happiness. My views are correct for me.

Having said this, I can care about the person(s) and overlook those things I may disagree with. I wish you both happiness. Good luck!
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Old 01-22-2006, 06:31 AM   #3 (permalink)
Kaldayen
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

Congratulations Scarlet! I'm very happy for you both! I wish you trust and understanding from your relatives and friends.
___
Kal
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Old 01-22-2006, 06:24 PM   #4 (permalink)
Pathless
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

Ah, CONGRATULATIONS to you both, Scarlet and Marguerite. What you are doing, in my opinion, is a bold, courageous, and empowering act. Although I don't 'know' either of you, I am happy for you and happy that you are celebrating your deep commitment to each other in a public way, despite the fear that you may feel. Everyone should be able to experience the joy, awe, and wonder of a life commitment to a partner and lover, if they so desire. No one should be denied this basic right simply because their choice of partner, or how they wish to express themselves, does not conform to the dominant paradigm.

Blessings and Joy to you both in your marriage and throughout your life together. I send you wishes of wonderful times; courage in the face of adversity; a deep and abiding knowledge of who you are, your own spirits and essences; and wishes for understanding among your families and loved ones. Wishes for a fruitful, productive, and joyful life together.

Congratulations, and more than that, thank you for having the courage to commit to each other in the face of oppression and fear. May you be admired and respected.

Peace.
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Old 01-22-2006, 07:30 PM   #5 (permalink)
Quahom1
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarlet Pimpernel
I told lunamoth to check the Lounge for an update, though I’m worried that this may very quickly end up more appropriate for the Politics and Society forum.

First off, in general, I’m doing fine – still preparing for graduation (one semester left, yahoo!) and for job-hunting. On top of that I’ve usually got one or two auditions and one or two concerts every month, so I’ve got plenty to keep me busy.




The main thing going on in my life is this:


Love shook my heart

like the wind on the mountain

rushing over the oak trees

- Sappho





Scarlet Pimpernel

and

Marguerite St. Just

are pleased to announce

that they will be legally married

in a private ceremony

on Tuesday, the twenty-first of February

Two thousand six

Maastricht, the Netherlands





I snailmailed this to a few members of my family in the US (with our real names, of course). I’ve been putting it off emailing it to the rest (I know email is not proper ettiquette but I don’t have snailmail addresses for everyone, besides which, overseas postage is shockingly expensive) for the same reason I’ve been putting off posting it here: fear of people’s reaction.



My reason for posting it here in the first place is not to offend anyone, or to wave my sexuality under anyone’s nose, or anything like that. It is simply that I care about the people who post here (as odd as it seems to care about people one has never actually met, I do), this is an important and joyous occurrence in my life, and I want to share it.



It seems ridiculous that, that being the case, I feel the need to couch my announcement in layers of apologetics. My partner and I are not trying to make a mockery of the institution of marriage. Far from it – it is because we have so much respect for marriage that we have made this decision. We love each other and want to spend our lives together, and want to publicly announce and solidify that commitment. We also want recognition of that commitment, from family and friends as well as from the Dutch government.



This ceremony will not take place in a house of worship – by Dutch law a civil marriage or registered partnership must take place first, followed by an optional religious ceremony (optional from the point of view of the government, of course). As neither my partner nor I are church-goers, and setting aside the difficulty of finding a clergyperson willing to perform a same-sex ceremony, having a church ceremony would seem to be pretending to be something we are not, and ultimately more disrespectful than only having a civil ceremony would be.



I fully expect some people here to be upset by this, just as I expect certain members of my family to be upset by it, or at least deeply confused. I’m not doing it, or even saying it, with the goal of upsetting you personally. Like I said, I care about the people here, and that’s why I want to share it with all of you. As a matter of fact, maybe if this starts a dialogue, that will lead to more openness and understanding.
I wish you and yours well; a prosperous and long life.

v/r

Q
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Old 01-22-2006, 08:23 PM   #6 (permalink)
lunamoth
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

Congratulations to you and Marguerite, Scarlet! I wish you many years of happiness together.

peace,
lunamoth
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Old 01-23-2006, 09:48 AM   #7 (permalink)
Scarlet Pimpernel
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for all your well-wishes and congratulations! The people on this site always lift me up and make me feel blessed. Thank you especially to juan and Q for being able to look past your personal convictions in order to wish happiness to the person. I admire your strength.

There's no deeply relieved and ecstatic smiley.
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Old 01-23-2006, 11:36 AM   #8 (permalink)
brucegdc
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

As others have said, congratulations and may your lives together be long and happy!

... Bruce
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Old 01-23-2006, 12:21 PM   #9 (permalink)
I, Brian
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

Congrats.
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Old 01-23-2006, 12:23 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

2 cool on tying the knot as it were!

Awesome the leap of putting yourself on the line amongst your fellow posters to this forum and life.

Absolutely fabulous on the positive responses from the crowd.


It all tugs at my heart and moistens my eyes.

Congrats Congrats Congrats!!!!
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Old 01-27-2006, 05:40 PM   #11 (permalink)
Scarlet Pimpernel
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

I am honored by everyone's congratulations and words of support. Thank you all.
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Old 02-13-2006, 11:29 AM   #12 (permalink)
13 grigori to 13/3/6
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Thumbs up Hey :o)

You've said sorry to us. Now I want to say sorry to you.

I'm sorry you have to take a risk when you tell people that you are getting married. I come from a different world (meaning I'm a bit of a loner) so I couldn't comment much on how I would feel if I was getting married, I would probably be miserable as I have alot of curses. However, from what I view in life and in movies and hear from relatives and friends and have read in books as a child, it is supposed to be the happiest occasion of your life. Instead, it is marred by disappointment and shock from not being able to fit in. I know what it's like, to feel oppressed, to know you are right when even those closest to you think you are wrong, and are so bloody sure that bitter hate slowly but surely builds up inside...but that's just me. Thank-you so much for saying that you care about us. It is courageous, but more than that, it was so innocent how you put it. And really nice. There is no need to say sorry at all to me, I'm not like that, and I never was. You're not raping or torturing or killing, you are just trying to do what is right, morally, by yourself, and by the one you love. I also worry about looking weird, or stuck-up, but I know you are really cool, and I guess if you eventually read this you will know I am too, and that's what counts. Kudos to you, and feel free to say anything to me as much as you wish to. Don't feel you (or anyone at all) shouldn't bother me, it's really stupid XD.

Chris

PS Just a heads up, I'll be posting some poetry soon (maybe tomorrow). I'm sure some of it will aid you in life. I wish you all the best for the wedding.
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Old 02-13-2006, 01:08 PM   #13 (permalink)
13 grigori to 13/3/6
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Chris

BTW I wasn't painting anyone in a bad light at all, I was just trying to help scarlet pimpernel (I actually don't know if they are male or female), but often I come across as holier than thou, or weird, and when people say that about me online, it makes me hate myself. You are all extremely precious, and to me too.
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Old 02-14-2006, 02:39 AM   #14 (permalink)
Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

Mazel tov, SP, and continued happiness for you and your partner.

For anybody who re/acts like some of the American fundies:
*the entire IF cattery empties, heading right for those who would try to rain on Scarlet Pimpernel's parade. There are dozens, if not hundreds, of :kitty: claws unsheathed*

ROWR

Don't look at them, especially the one that Princess Shaquoia just dealt with.


Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
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Old 02-14-2006, 05:49 AM   #15 (permalink)
pohaikawahine
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Re: I'm aware this might offend some...

congratulations both of you - wish you both all the best and much love .... aloha nui, pohaikawahine
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