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Old 05-04-2007, 06:16 PM   #1 (permalink)
pedro0
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I am in need of some advice

I have never done this before but I am in need of some advice. I have been on my knees in prayer over this situation and would just like to hear what some Godly women would have to share. This may sound really silly or even petty but I need someone's thoughts other than my own. I have 2 sisters, one is saved, the other claims she is saved but is in bondage to a lot of things. Anyway that is not this particular issue. The sister who has issues has asked me to take her son's senior pictures, I said yes and we set up the time. No one showed up, no one called. We set up another time to take them, no one showed, no one called. Here is the thing, my other sister, who is older than me and I look up to her and do admire her walk with the Lord, shares with me after I told her the whole situation and my frustrations of not wanting to do the pictures at all tells me to do it anyway because it is the right thing to do. I feel as if I'm being taking advantage of. I have set my time aside, changed plans to do this and she doesn't even inform me that she can't make it. Because I am a Christian, should I just let her do this to me over and over again? Forgiveness isn't the issue; I would forgive my sisters' both of anything. Should I just keep setting up dates only for her not to show or call? My older sister's response is what bothers me the most because although she is a great Christian - she is such the enabler. So anyway, Sisters out there - I am seeking Godly advice on this. If I am being petty, tell me (gently) but shouldn't we, as Christians, draw the line somewhere on people taking advantage of us?
Seeking God's Will,
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Old 05-04-2007, 07:15 PM   #2 (permalink)
Miss Amy
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Re: I am in need of some advice

Well, if you want my advice.. which is not Christian however it is humanitarian....

I think that you need to be respectful of both your sister and yourself. Speak to her open and honestly. Tell her what you are feeling and let her know that you are hurt by the choices she is making. Tell her that you would still like to do this favour for her, however if she misses the time again let her know that that will be it.

You can be open, honest and loving at the same time.
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Old 05-04-2007, 09:19 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Re: I am in need of some advice

I'm not a gal and I have only brothers, but I do consider myself Christian. I gotta go with Miss Amy on this one.
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Old 05-04-2007, 09:42 PM   #4 (permalink)
wil
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Re: I am in need of some advice

Not female...Jesus says forgive 7 times 70....not set yourself up so you have to forgive 7 times 70.

I like the previous responses, but I don't have quite enough info. If you are a professional photographer and you left a slot open for this...and you are doing it gratis for family...I'm afraid I wouldn't have opened the second slot. I would have told them whatever I tell other clients when they cancel, this is the cancellation fee. Now I'll stil take your pix for free, but you owe me the cancellation fee. And I'm afraid I can't reschedule you, but should you come by, when I am here, and I am free, I'l try to slip you in...you may have to wait a while...and I may have to hurry...but we'll get some good shots.

Now if you are not the pro, and are just great with a camera..I'd carry it with me and take advantage of the next time we got together...and provide the picture in whatever suitable setting you find.

We are not to be doormats, nor feel like doormats...unconditional love, kindness and forgiveness doesn't require that we be doormats.
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Old 05-04-2007, 10:34 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Pedro,

Allow me to offer my philosophy of how I handle this. If someone asks to borrow $5, I let them borrow it. The next time they ask to borrow $5, I remind them they still owe me the first $5 (unless I am fully willing to loan them the second $5).

Here is how I would handle it. Your sister and you already set up a time to take pictures in the past, and she no-showed. The next time she asks to set up a time, ask her what happened the last time the two of you set up a time.
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